Nepali Ukhans

Nachna najanne aaganai tedho - For the one who can't dance the floor is not even.
Bandar ko puchhar lauro na hatiyar - Monkey's tail: neither a stick, nor a weapon. (Doesnt apply to Hanuman, of course.)
Sikami chhen swani bhwatthaw - In the carpenter's house, rickety stairs.
Jahan garho, tehin sarho - Where rough, there tough
Nakhaun ta din bhari ko sikar. Kahu ta khancha bau ko anuhar - (monkey) You dont want to not eat it coz its the whole day's worth of hunting, but you dont want to eat it coz it resembles your uncle.
Jun goru ko singh chhaina, uskai naam Tikhe - The buffalo which is hornless gets named horny.
Haatti aayo haatti aayo fussa! - Elephant's coming! Elephant's coming.... Elephant's not coming!!
Haati chhiryo puchchar adkyo - Elephant slipped in, but tail got stuck.
Khane Mukh lai Jungale Chhekdaina - An eating mouth cannot be blocked by a moustache
Najane gaun ko batai nasodhnu - The way to the village that you're not going to- don't ask.
Jati jogi aye pani kanai chireko - No matter how many monks come to beg, all have split ears.
Jo hocho uskai mukhma ghocho - Small people get jabbed on their faces.
chokta khana gako budi jhol ma dubera maree. The old woman aiming for the meat pieces got drowned in the broth.
Aafai ta mahadev uttano par kasley dine bar - I am myself as broke as Mahadev, who'll give you a bride.
Raat bhari karayo dakshina harayo - (beggar) Shouted all night long and lost the collected alms.
Ghoda chadhe ladincha - If you mount a horse, you'll fall down.
Kaalo akshar, Bhainshi barabar - (To illiterate person) - Black letters are like buffaloes
Kam kuro eka tira, kumlo boki thimi tira - Work and things aside, gathered things to go to Thimi.
Ohrali lageko mriga lai bachho le khedchha - A descending deer gets chased at by even a calf.
Hune biruwa ko chillo paat - Fittest plants have shiny leaves.
Kukur ko puchhar bara barsa dhungro ma hale pani ghumrincha- A dog's tail will remain curled no matter how long you put it in a cylindrical pipe.
Jasle maha kadhyo, tyasle hath chatyo- One who fetches the honey gets to lick one's hands
Bhagya mani ko bhutai kamaro- To a fated person, even the ghost is his slave.
Nau taley gharma na jhyal na dhoka - In 9 storied building, not even a single door or window.
Barha barsa ramayan padayo, sita kaski joyi? Took 12 years to teach Ramayana, but still can't tell who is Sita a wife of.

By the Paan Stall

What is the waiting procedure at the paan stall? I was politely waiting for the paan maker to finish making a set for a customer, when some guy came wearing a helmet and ordered some for himself, delivering a spit on the wall next to the stall. I involuntarily glanced at the mountain of spit stain on the wall (and voluntarily jerked my head elsewhere). If that is the process of ordering a paan, I would never buy any. I am not a spitter.

By the way, what's with the spitting near the paan stall? Is that where one practices? And how come there's a wall next to every paan stall designated for paan-spits? Or is it a communal effort to make an abstract mural?

Some people I see on the streets are experts at it. You know the criteria of expertise, don't you:
1. to expel an aerodynamic missile of ... umm... spit... from your mouth with minimal or zero noise (that is, spray)
2. to do so without wetting your lips, and
3. to land your spit where you want it.

You think this is yucky? What about seeing people wiping their recently spitted mouth with the back of their hands? What about the 'street hawkers'? No, I didn't mean peddlers. I meant the throat clearers. And you must have seen people in bikes, micros, and tempos, most often drivers, spitting out of the window. One wouldn't want to be behind that driver, would one? And lets only mention the public nose honkers.

So nod your head. And say it isn't so.

An event that followed made me forget the gross sighting though. As the paanmaker was flipping out small tins of bright, apparently edible things, and shaking them above the betel leaves, I saw a man walking his toddling daughter. There was a reddish heart shaped 'i love you' 'hydrogenated' balloon stringed to one of the 'laces' of her bhoto. She was ecstatically tugging at the string, unaware of her awkward walk, often bumping into her father's legs. She was absolutely delighted at the bobbing wonder tied to her bhoto.

The Festival of Lights

Tihar is here already.

Kacophonic Kids are crying 'Bhailiram Bhailiram' downstairs. They're saying 'aakhum bakhum, sel-roti chakhum', but they want money. What should I do?

I was trying to fix those blinking lights on the balcony of our kitchen. But during the process, the blinks drove me crazy- brain's saying too much change in the environment! And I now am feeling nauseous. When I close my eyes, I can still feel the blinks.

I hate putting those oil lamps in our terrace. We get speedy winds from Bagmati river and there are no obstructions in front of our house. By the time I get to my third installment, the first one's light goes out. Like a candle in the wind... you know, it's way too frustrating.

My advice to you: be careful with those lights, you might burn your house down.

I have left the bathroom lights on too just in case goddess Laxmi needs a pee break during her rounds at our home. I'm that considerate. But when exactly does she pay the visit? Coz I might be inside the bathroom, and I dont want her to be crossing her legs in agony.

Woozy

It is a feeling that u feel in your head. In fact, u dont feel anything else- even that feel that you're supposed to get of the beer mug in your hand.

I just lift my hands slightly as if I am an aeroplane airlifted effortlessly... I sway my body as if the aerodynamics is seriously at work. Also, I close my eyes to savor the buoyancy of the moment, and enjoy whatever is going through my body.

That, my friend, is what 'woozy' feels like.

A Simple Wish

By default, i'd like to be in my bed, with my laptop, preferably with a hot cup of something. And a waarrrmmmmmm blanket.

Rhymes of Paradigms

Skewed views. Oceans of notions. Wrecked aspects. Lots of thoughts. Steamy themes. Flimsy whimsies. Detrimental sentiments, and onions of opinions.

Here's another helping of my almost daily blog. I have no agenda whatsoever. Not that I used to... I am a compassionate soul, you know. I sense the disappointment when you type in my URL, and hit enter (or 'Go'), only to find the same old post that was posted a while ago. I empathize with you. That's why I came with this 'space filler'. But you know, idea and creativity are scarce to come by. And I know better than to flog my mind- it only works if I pat it.

Diben, Shalin, and moi were out having coffee. Coffee sucked, but the conversation didn't. I wonder whether Bakery Cafe, at least in some locations, has already become a has-been. There were only a few people, none of them of youth kind. and the waiters weren't that informed about the menu things. For example, Shalin ordered a 'Fresh Beans, Tall'. Then when Diben and I said 'Macchiato', the waiter asked 'That too tall?'. Then we hinted that macchiato comes in a universally standardized tiny cup, but the waiter gave no response. Also, to get someone's attention, we had to flail our arms about, the amount of effort put equaling that of calling a cab from opposite of a busy street.

But the visit was worthwhile. We solved some fundamental national problems. I naively predicted that the present political imbroglio cannot last for more than 5 years, coz the business community, which is getting more influential and more annoyed, is getting high inertia from the political interface. Also, the foreign bodies are increasingly getting 'interested' in Nepal's situation... so... blah-di-blah... there will be sooomeeeee change soon. There simply has got to be.

We also brainstormed, brooded over ideas, and came up with many-a-recommendation worthy of commendation. For instance, we all know that many national resources and conveniences of the mass are going down the drain simply because the public organizations do not coordinate activities. We came up with the idea to recommend HMG to conjure up a 'Bridger Act', which would give legal identity to Bridgers; bodies who coordinate, facilitate collaborations, and basically make our lives more live-able. To illustrate, allow me to state an example. Remember that time when the water supply guys were digging the road one day after the road department black-topped the place? Or, when NEA would declare a lights-out session when the water supply people turned on the taps to the valley, so that people could not use water pumps? Well, with a successful implementation of the Bridger Act, these will not happen.

Blech! Who am I kidding? Ok, end of story. I appreciated your visit to my blog. Good bye. I hope u come again and again. Bookmark it. Dogear it. And tell others about this silly site.

Oh, by the way, the title has nothing to do whatsoever about the content of this post. It just sounded interesting enough for a title.