Friday- Television Shows

Amitabh Bachchan and KBC. Great pair. Both are profitting greatly from each other, obviously. But it is a great innovation by which the Big B is more humanized to his fans by improvised performance. People can now shake hands with him, tell him how big fans they are and offer their eulogies. Personally, I think KBC-2 is the best that happened to him in Bollywood since looong time back, Black aside. I liked his performance in a few ads, including that Hajmola ad. I equally hated his cassock-clad 'Bharatiya' stance in Dabur Chyawanprash, and that senseless ad of 'Give me red'.

Also, I think KBC-2 is the ONLY good thing that is aired by all these Hindi channels.

Desperate Housewives is also still interesting. I like the way when the narrator ends the episode with a statement that strings all the events in that episode meaningfully.

Above all, though I am desperately awaiting the Seinfeld series. Has it already started? All I know is that they come at 7:45 pm. And they are taunting me evilly with those teasers. I would give up a whole season of friends to watch 1 episode of seinfeld, even if I have already watched it before. But is it really 'comedy about nothing' as they are claiming? Isn't nothing something? he he... see, I get tangled up in my own psychological webs. I am Path-80 K.

YOGA: The 'Ish' craze v. Ram Dev Guru

Did you hear this news? This link: http://www.path-80k.com/c_yore_eye_cue.html explains the new revolutionary yoga spinoff mastered by Swamy P. Ish, a staunch worshipper of Stoop Ei, the Hindu god of Wit. Although Swamy Ish reveres Stup Ei Deity, his 'prabachans' are purely philosophical and yoga-like. Below is an illustration of the simplest yoga exercise that has started to gain much popularity in cheek by jowl with methods of the video guru, Swami Ram Dev of Aastha Channel. This method has gained much acceptance throughout India, mainly among the foreigners.

Revelation Path-80 K
This is an original formula devised by Swamy Phool Ish. The reason of its popularity is because of the fact that the exercise takes so less time and energy, and does not need any special equipment. Swamy Phool openly criticises the video-guru, Mahaswamy Ram Dev. "About 40% of the abdominal cavity is empty space, which gets filled up after you have a meal. This region is mostly a set of loose coils of intestines. These organs are largely unheld and floating. If you roll your tummy like done by the so-called Mahaswamy, chances are that the intestines will get tangled up, and you'll get a knot of entrails. The most pervasive and common knot formation is when the small intestines form a 'V', and the large intestines tightly form a vertical line below it, forming a 'Y'. This is also known as the Knot 'Y' formation in medical vernacular. This might lead to severe digestive complications. The food has virtually no idea of where to go."

Instead, Phool Ish Swamy advocates the Path-80 K formula. The subject is to stretch the left hand's thumb and the forefinger so that they are perpendicular to each other. Then he/she should draw an imaginary horizontal line that connects the two eyebrows. Then, he/she will align the thumb's length with this line. The subject should keep in mind that the forefinger is vertical at this point. In this position, the subject should stand in front of the mirror, and gaze at himself/herself. The Path-80 K Revelation will come almost immediately. He/She will see his/her true self, no matter what occupation, social class, or walk of life he/she comes from.
Focusing and dwelling upon the revelation can even cure the Knot 'Y's, and even cures the rash that develops around the lumbar region (a cure commonly known as 'Knot-Rash Null')
Santa Singh gave a testimonials: "Intelligence demanded at work had driven me crazy. A weeklong of this mental relaxation did me wonders. This is a totally practical experience. It is not a cult. Nor does it entail any religious bullshit."
Phool Ish has also prescribed these vitamins capsules that one can safely ingest:
'0'(pronounced naught) No Ing
'0' Sen C-Bal
'0' C-Reus
'N'-Sain.
I would like to get your feedback. Please email me at: i_revere_stup_ei_deity@n-sa-nitty.orgy

Mangala Mangala

I watched Mangal Pandey today. Somehow I knew it wouldnt be a great movie. Bollywood seriously lacks good directors. Even Ashutosh Gowariker wasnt his best in Lagaan, although his innovative direction wowed many. Lagan actually started off wonderfully, but Gowariker fumbled totally after that start of the cricket match. Aamir should do another movie with Ashutosh, I think. Regarding M. Pandey, one critic had said :
"I'm astonished. What was Aamir Khan trying to do with Ketan Mehta's Mangal Pandey? Going by the historical inaccuracy, detailing inconsistency and utter inanity of the finished product, one can merely hazard a guess. Perhaps, on some bizarre level, the actor was envious of Shah Rukh Khan's much-lampooned Asoka and decided to make his own history-rogering film where he could sport long hair and emerge gloriously out of bathwater. Tsk."
Well, here is one good thing that came out of the 'Mangal Pandey' phenomenon:
While we're at it, let me say that the Bachhans should be forever banned from acting, along with the Kapoors and the Deols. And most others, for that matter. Make way for new faces. And enough with these 'baring daring' movies. Those actresses are obviously not bold enough to bare. Or maybe it was the censor bored. I know that I for one definitely got bored. What I mean is, do it only if you could go all the way. Like in Kamasutra, A tale of love :D.
Ok, I watched 'Awara, Paagal, Deewana'. Don't ask why. Akshay Kumar and Sunil Shetty's in it. There is one scene that is a DITTO copy of Matrix's lobby scene. Frame by Frame! The only thing is that you see Akshay's unflattering self in place of Keanu! Also, I got to see this fight scene in another movie that is the DITTO dizzital copy of Neo's fight with numerous Smiths in that courtyard in Matrix Reloaded. Funny part: Akshays replace Smiths, and good ol' Salman plays Neo. It was pathetically funny!
Here are some of the indian movies I loved:
Satya
Black (altho Rani and Amitabh could have downplayed their overacting at places)
Kamasutra, A Tale of Love
Satyajit Ray's movies
Pakeezah
Masoom
Sahib, Bibi, aur Ghulam
Yuva (I only liked Abhishek and Rani's characters. I liked Dil Se much much better).
I hope they make more of the movies that I like. And please, no more songs. Maybe the director could put ALL the songs before or after the movie. But definitely not DURING.

Lumber Slumber

I have had many unpleasant experiences at Budhanilkantha School, including onstage with stunballs and female dresses. It is quite funny when I think of it now, but it was annoying then.
Now, I have been known to be quite proficient when it comes to sleeping. The only reason I would wake up when I had to is for disciplinary compliance. Besides, I would miss breakfast, which is the only meal I liked at school.
What can I say? I just like to sleep. I have slept as much as 14 hours straight. Also, I sleep real deep - 'like a log'. So the boys would play pranks on me, as they would on anything and everything unusual. During 'lights off' hours, a group of assailants would carry my bed out from the dorm room to the corridor. I of course would be sleeping the whole time. In the morning, the sound of shuffling feet would stir me awake. The boys would be heading towards the bathroom (which was at the other end of the corridor) . My half-lidded eyes would vaguely make out nightsuit-clad hands clutching toothbrushes.
Sometimes I would manage to wake up during the 'heist'. But that would happen only when a particular perpetrator, who has a high-pitched laughter, could not control himself. I would holler until they all scram. But I would be too comfortable to get off the bed and drag it all the way to its original place.

Santa Singh's Headgear

You must have seen the turbaned gentleman occasionally biking down the streets of Kupondol. I wish that Santa's turban would fit into a helmet. That way, his head would be safer. Brain is a fragile thing - one crack in the skull and say byebye to Santa-Banta jokes.
So I got the permission from Valley Traffic Police Force (VTPF) to make my design. Take a look. I welcome your critique. I have until Friday to submit the prototype to the VTPF office.


My second project is to design the helmet for a chef. That will not be a big problem, as I will just tweak with the dimensions. And voila! Why would a chef need a custom design in his helmet? So that he can start wearing the hat from his home. No, driving a car won't do, because the heights will not accomodate the hat. No again, if he were to put his head outside the window all the time, the wind will probably blow it away.
My design does not accomodate fancy turbans, like the ones in the pictures on the left. Such turbans require custom-made helmets; also, one will have to make serious sacrifices on the safety metrics.

Still more to come are the custom-made designs for:
1. Dudes with Afros
2. Dogs and cows
3. Babas/Bob Marley look-alikes
4. Margaret Simpson